By Rick Mitchell, M.D.

After the wonderfully human view of Mary provided by my wife last month for Mother’s Day, it would be negligent of me to not spend a little while talking about Jesus’ earthly father, Joseph, in this month when we celebrate the fathers in the world. But interestingly, while the history of Jesus’ life is full of stories of the Virgin Mary, Joseph is remarkably absent from the Bible, almost apocryphal. Some scholars suggest he is critical only to establish that Jesus came from the line of David in accordance with prophesy. He is absent from the letters of Paul and the Gospel of Mark, and Matthew and Luke give us potentially conflicting views of his lineage. We last hear of Joseph at his Passover visit to the Temple with the 12-year-old Jesus.

Why does Jesus need an earthly father? For that matter, why do any of us, biological imperatives for procreation aside? What does a father do once a child is born that is so important? We can’t nurse children; we lack the parts. And while we can support mothers by doing our fair share of changing diapers, making sure Mom eats and sleeps, and other things like that, really, those functions could be reasonably fulfilled by a grandmother, or an aunt, or a friend. Why do we need a father?

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, 1 in 3 children lives without their biological father in their home. According to the non-profit National Fatherhood Initiative, those children are 4 times more likely to live in poverty, 7 times more likely to become pregnant as a teen, twice as likely to die in infancy, develop obesity, or drop out of high school, and they are more likely to have behavioral problems, to face abuse and neglect, to abuse alcohol and drugs, to commit crimes, and to go to prison.

Having a father can help combat all these things that can lead to an unhealthy life. But I’d like to take a more personal look at how fathers can improve our health.

I was blessed as a young child to live in Dorchester, MA in the ground floor apartment of a 2-family home owned by my mother’s parents Joey and Kitty (who had bought it from my father’s mother’s father!), and across the street from my father’s parents, Mimi and Papa. 3-year-old Ricky Mitchell had only to call upstairs, “Joey, are you there?”, to be met with “Ricky, is that you?” This was then followed by “Joey, are you callin’ me? I’ll be right up!” And up I would go to spend time with one of the best friends of my childhood.

He would sing me cowboy songs I didn’t understand. He would get me a drink of special water he kept cold in his refrigerator. We made Jell-O together. He taught me how to pitch pennies, and I would somehow always win. He and my grandmother both patiently taught me card games, and although I didn’t know it, my numbers and some basic math skills. He would endlessly repeat things like this poem:

“Somebody said that it couldn’t be done,

But he with a chuckle replied,

That maybe it couldn’t, but he would be one

Who would never say so ‘til he’d tried.”

If I was in a different mood, across the street I’d be able to see my grandfather, Papa, who was always delighted to listen as I played his electric organ. If my mother and father were working, Papa would keep an eye on me as he ran the small newsstand shop he owned in the lobby of a large office building.  And if a particular candy bar caught my eye, surely that was a bad one and I’d be helping him out by not letting him sell a bad one to one of his customers.

What of my own father? The one who used the money earned from the sale of a successful business to open “Little Ricky’s Ice Cream Shop,” a business which unfortunately failed. The one who for much of my childhood worked two jobs because his family needed to be able to make ends meet? The one who loved me so much that he would let me come with him when he worked cleaning buildings in the evenings just so he could spend time with me? Who viciously FORCED me to help him work so I could know the difference between Phillips Head and Flat Head, how to unclog a toilet, how to wire a switch, how to change a tire? What good could he have done for my health?

What could Jesus have learned from an earthly father? How do you explain the benefits to your health of the men who taught you how to love?